Without You
by FootballChick12
Summary: Oneshot. Lily and James. Updated!


_A/N- This is the updated version. I made some changes that you guys suggested. Tell me what you think.

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I didn't know what to do anymore.

For six long years, I had wanted nothing more than to be able to call Lily Evans mine. But for years she had been tormenting me.

She said she couldn't love me because I didn't take school seriously so I spent hours on my homework every night. Still nothing changes. I ended up with all O's on my OWLs and I excelled in every class. Not good enough for her.

I had been made Head Boy that year so you might think she'd leap into my arms with joy that I had finally changed my ways but no. She just said that I'll abuse the privilege.

And then, she wouldn't talk to me.

I didn't even know what I did wrong! But she wouldn't come out of her dorm for three days. Three whole days! And she hadn't said one word to me in a week.

Just all of the sudden she decided that I, James Potter, apparently wasn't good enough to be friends with. After staying up late all those years talking, laughing and joking. Those memories filled with secrets and flirting she decided to throw it all out the window.

I wanted to know why.

_Did I do something wrong? What's bothering her? Is she sick?_

_Or crazy?_

Then she had got me all worked up just by thinking about her right before a big potions exam so naturally, I had lost any concentration I once possessed!

I slammed shut my potions book and bury my face in my hands.

"Don't let her get to you James, if she hasn't realized all that you have done for her then she's not worth it." Sirius, the best friend a guy could ever had, said. He had always been there for me and he knew how badly Lily had hurt me.

Angrily, I stood up. And without questioning me, Sirius watched me leave the library in search of a certain red head.

As I began walking down the hall, I pulled out the famous Marauders Map from my pocket. Lily Evans was in the East Tower.

When I reached the very top of the tower I found her sitting on the windowsill, her flaming red hair blowing gently around her face. Her emerald green eyes I could stare at for days and stay completely content, darted over to my figure standing in the doorway.

Upon seeing me, she immediately stood up in a huff and headed for the other doorway that lead back down the tower.

"Lily we have to talk!" I said before she could reach the doorway.

This stopped her in her tracks. Never have I ever even thought about calling her Lily. It was always Evans. I think the reason why it was Evans was because we had a relationship filled with constant teasing so many people were under the misconception that we hated each other beyond belief.

So Evans it had been.

Slowly, she turned her head to face me. Her eyes studied me curiously.

"Look I know you hate me. I know you want nothing more to do with me for the rest of my life. Fine. Just tell me why." I pleaded.

Again, she turned and headed for the door.

"Lily, I have spent almost seven years of my life chasing after you." I took a step towards her, my legs felt like mush. "Chasing after something that I couldn't have."

She shook her head as if she couldn't hear what I was saying; large puddles of tears filling her eyes.

"I have done everything I could think of to make you happy. But I guess it isn't enough. Lily Evans can never be mine." I felt my own eyes swelling up but I urged the tears away.

"I'll just have to get over that." I continued my voice becoming a little shaking. "I promise you I will leave you alone forever if you just tell me why I'm not good enough."

It burned my insides to say that. To say that I was willing to give up the love of my life.

Forever.

She stayed silent. And I let her.

"I don't hate you James." Lily chocked out and took a step back towards me. "I don't hate you. Sure you can be annoying as heck sometimes but I don't."

Lily lifted her eyes from the ground and met mine. "I just hoped that if you thought I was mad at you, you'd really think I didn't like you and would leave me alone."

"Oh," I whispered and looked away. Was I that annoying to her that she didn't want anything to do with me?

"No I didn't mean it like that." Lily walked over to me and gently turned my head to look at her. Those big green eyes burning into mine. "I wanted you to leave me alone because I was hoping if you were gone, my feelings for you would go too."

My brow furrowed as I listened to the words coming from their mouth. It was like she was speaking in a strange tongue I'd never heard before.

"Because James, I've finally realized how much I need you; How much I love you."

After standing there watching me, a shocked expression on my face she did the unthinkable. She took a step towards me, her bottom lip quivering. And after years of waiting, wanting, praying, wishing and hoping...

She.

Kissed.

Me.

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_A/N Et volia! What'd you think? Please review and let me know._


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